Locker 2375 c18 Hanna Montana Saves the Day.

Posted on | May 16, 2009 | 1 Comment

THIS IS A ROUGH DRAFT

Locker 2375 c18

Hanna Montana Saves the Day.

We were trapped!

We couldn’t leave the nurses room through the main entrance because of the SWAT team in the hall!

The 10 tactical commandos who had descended upon my locker with fire extinguishers and cans of whip cream were focused, sharp, and waiting for the command to execute their mission.

Who knows what that might be!

Nathaniel was watching the commandos using a micro mirror that was attached to a collapsible wire extension rod.

“They have a state of the art communication system, GPS, some kind of signal shield and high frequency location devices, these guys are really pros”, Nathaniel said as he pulled the mirror back and sat down on the recovery cot looking very distracted.

Without prompting Kimberlee and Miguel hopped into the door to the nurses room, Kimberlee took one look at Nathaniel and made the hand signals to show she would create another distraction for another month of lunches bringing the count up to 2 months.

As fast as we could all shake our heads in agreement the mimes were off!

Nathaniel quickly deployed a micro video surveillance camera that looked remarkably similar to June Bug, one of those big round rust coloured beetles that can fly but would rather walk.

The camera was giving us full video of what was going on with only minor disruption that Sam figured had to be coming from the communication net of the commandos.

Our mouths all fell wide open as we saw Miguel do the most impressive cartwheel into the middle of the commandos and then out of nowhere Kimberlee came tumbling with an impressive volley onto the shoulders of Miguel!

Then the two mimes proceeded to pretend that they were pirates on a galley looking for a lost treasure.

“Oh oh… this is not looking good”, Sam began to mumble under his breath.

One of the commandos was backing up from the rest taking a good look around as if he suspected that the two mimes were some sort of distraction.

Sam frantically sent the command to the remote June Bug Cam to reverse it but the Commando was too fast and the screen of the PC was a sea of snow and as I poked my head around the corner I could see the commando looking under his shoe to see what he had stepped on.

As with all good technological inventions that comes out of the collective genius of Sam, Ana, Kevin, Omar, Nathaniel, Brandon and now me, there was a micro vial of green goo built into the cam that looked and smelled like Gerber’s mushy peas baby food, after it had been eaten and digested by a baby.

The look on the face of the commando, well his eyes that was all we could see, told us he was disgusted by the mess and didn’t suspect for a minute that we had the commandos under surveillance!

Before Miguel and Kimberlee could break into their second act the biggest commando, he looked remarkably similar to a cross between Blue from Jungle Book and the incredible hulk, grabbed them both around the waist and hauled them off in the direction of the school pool.

Here we were trapped without a plan and we needed to get into the locker before the commandos, although we had no idea what we might find!

Just as I was about to open my mouth my phone began to ring.

All our eyes were as wide as pie plates as the ring was getting progressively louder and louder.

The ringtone to my custom hybrid phone, a really cool phone that was still in prototype phase at the MIT Media Lab, didn’t just ring but project whatever the tone was in a 3D likeness on the floor 2 feet in front of the phone!

So of course I had the theme of Star Wars as my ringtone and what was being projected?

Obviously Chewbacca dancing with Darth Vader!

The problem with this new phone is it projects the image through walls and it puts that image 2 feet in front of the phone.

In this case the timing was all-wrong and the image was projected through the wall of the nurses office directly in front of the commando who had so unfortunately stepped on the June Bug Cam.

I am not sure who was more surprised, me or the guard who had a very authentic life size 3D image of Chewy and Darth Vader dancing in front of him.

I answered the phone as fast as I could hoping the commando would think he was imagining things, I crossed my fingers and toes for added luck.

“Tod you won’t believe how bad your timing is” I said into the phone.

Tod and I had gone to another school together way back but now met at scouts every Thursday and we were now collaborating on a micro go-cart powered by human generated methane, better known as fart gas.

“Max I just had a break through” Tod had been working for weeks on the necessary food combination to generate maximum gas with the minimum sound.

“Max, Mean Beans and pickled walnuts all covered in a mild honey and marmite mixture seems to deliver a sufficient quality of gas on a consistent basis” I could hear the excitement in Tod’s voice.

Usually I would be very excited but I was a bit distracted, “Tod I have a bit of an issue to work through here can I call you back?”

I hung up without waiting for a response.

Then almost as fast as the commandos had arrived they were running towards the main foyer of the school as were what seemed every student and teacher in the place.

Sam looked down at his communication watch that just registered an encrypted message and whispered,” Ana has a plan!”

Ana was also known as a master of disguise, once she even imitated the French teacher Ms. Mouldybaguette and got away with it!

Sam quickly tapped his laptop computer and brought up the main foyer security camera on his screen and true to form there was Ana standing on a makeshift stage looking exactly like Hanna Montana and singing The Climb!

We all took a second look, Ana had outdone herself!

“Quick we have a window”, Sam shouted!

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